Listen, listen

Manhattan. I enjoyed Hannah and Her Sisters, Husbands and Wives, and Mighty Aphrodite, but Manhattan just didn't cut it. Forgive me, Woody.

Anyway, I discovered a great new site today called Podiobooks. I've finally calmed down about classic literature becoming free to download, and now I'm discovering lesser-known works that are a bit more modern. I thought I'd just download one book...I mean, the only audiobook I have ever downloaded was Mere Christianity by CS Lewis. Needless to say, I got nine. Here's all that I downloaded, complete with link, picture, and the website's summary. (Note: Each chapter of the audiobooks can be downloaded via links found at the very bottom of the page)

1. A Brief Conversation with My Hair by Russell Bradbury-Carlin
A Brief Conversation with My Hair is a collection of short literary humor pieces that have been previously featured on such websites at McSweeney's, Yankee Pot Roast, The Big Jewel, Opium Magazine, and The Science Creative Quarterly. Some of the titles (which may give you an idea of the content) are: "The Calls of Cthulu", "All I Need to Learn, I Learned From Kindergarten Cop", "Diary of a Grocery Cart", "Dionysus: Party Clown", and "A Brief Conversation with My Hair". The forty-plus pieces in this collection find the bizarre in the everyday or some bit of the everyday in the already bizarre. If you ever wondered if Allen Ginsburg could have put his considerable talent to writing pay-per-click ads or how Calvin and Hobbes may have responded to reading Hemingway, you will find the answers here.

2. All Kinds of Things Kill by Robert R. Best
Nine-story horror anthology by Robert R. Best.

3. Blood Witness by Dave HittCatherine is a 1500 year old vampire. (She’s really 1800 but she lies about her age.) Chris is a high school senior. She is a blood sucking creature of the night. He is a Jehovah’s Witness. Together they discover something that threatens the existence of every vampire, and the only solution is to break the One Law that binds them all.

4. Forever Fifteen by Kimberly Steele
Lucy Albert is not your ordinary maladjusted suburban adolescent. Born into the era of the Black Plague in medieval Italy, Lucy is chosen as a mate by the sinister vampire Sebastianus against her will. Struggling to survive in a modern world she cannot identify with, Lucy isn't looking for attention.

Welcome to Forever Fifteen, where a lonely girl seeks refuge in a world awash in everyday brutality, a world where only blood and death can sate her hunger. Journey into Lucy's past as you experience the terror of the Black Death and the harsh reality of womanhood in the Middle Ages. Enter Forever Fifteen, the fast-paced thrill ride that is redefining vampire horror.

5. How To Succeed in Evil by Patrick E. McLean
Alternately funny and dark, a HtSiE is the story of Edwin Windsor, Evil Efficiency Consultant. A biting satire of both modern business and the conventions of the superhero genre.

6. Sellout by Brad Lockwood
A bored loner helps a stranger, falls in love, and becomes an accomplice.

7. Stories I Told Myself by Patrick E. McLean
Funny, moving and always exquisitely well-produced, this collection of short stories and essays from the award-winning Seanachai podcast is not to be missed. If you like this American Life, but wish that Ira Glass' voice was a bit softer on the ears, then this is the audio book for you.

8. Synthetic Marmalade by Mike Luoma
Poems, Song Lyrics and Magic Spells written by Mike Luoma over the past 20 years. Luoma's poems and lyrics range from idylls on Vermont ("The Monkton Road") to songs the Boss might like ("Cars & Girls")to spell-like ritual poetry ("Ceremonies of Light and Dark"), and all points in between. The poems and spells are recited, the lyrics are sung accompanied by a guitar, recorded straight to two-track with some overdubs. The content is presented in a different order from the print book so that songs and poems could be mixed together. Special guest Sean Kelly of the Samples helped record "Sonny's Got A Gun" and plays on the track.

9. The Takeover by Mur Lafferty
If you've ever worked with corporate zombies, then you've experienced The Takeover. Web designer Maureen and her friends struggle to adapt to their new work environment as coworkers from Zombinc, the zombie staffing company, come to work with them. Language barriers, arguments over the contents of the work fridge, and what a "promotion" really means are all addressed in this "Shaun of the Dead" meets "The Office" audiodrama.

Well, this post DEFINITELY didn't turn into Oprah's Book Club. Anywho, I haven't started any of these yet, mainly because I don't know where to begin. The Takeover sounds like the most probable pick, though. I'll review it in future posts.
Unfortunately, that's my Friday night. Woody Allen and audiobooks. Kind of modern-bohemian. Mostly pathetic.
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